"As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for you, my God.
My soul thirsts for God, for the living God..." (Psalm 42:1)\
You ever just feel it, deep down?
That hunger, that thirst, that 'ache' for more...
A closer relationship with God....
More sensitivity to His Spirit...
A hunger for Him, and desire to have Him direct your every step?
I do...I feel it all the time!
I ache to know Him more, and to follow Him closely.
I long to know His will for me, and to step in complete faith and confidence.
I want to be known, like David, as "a man after (God's) own heart"--and to have HIM think of me this way.
I want to be His hands and His feet, to represent Him to a world that is dying, blind, and deluded into thinking they're 'enlightened'.
I want to have such confidence in His leading that, no matter what it means, I step up and step out, convinced that He's going to take care of my family and myself.
...but I'm still not there yet.
I still struggle with faith, doubt, and fear.
I know, I should've successfully and once-and-for-all put this behind me.
After all, I've seen Him work in so many ways in my past!
He has shown Himself faithful every single time I've stepped out in faith.
He knows my needs and my future.
I know the truth. I know He's there. I know I should "have no fear for what the future holds, for I know Who holds the future" (whoever said that was pretty smart)!
But I still struggle.
Father, I love you. I want to be closer to You. I want to follow your will, without fail. I want to make you smile, to please you with my worshipful life.
Forgive me for the times I shrink back. Keep me close. Inspire me and lead me.
Increase my sensitivity to your Spirit, so that I may KNOW your call and step out into it.
In Jesus Name...